The Super Bowl of Guacamole

My former supervisor advised me to write a book on my kitchen experiences.  This would be chapter 4, I think...

First, I need to say - I make awesome Guacamole.  And I don't use a packet.

Second, I do not have a recipe, necessarily.

Third, I have recently learned that I cut my avocados incorrectly.

I am not sure it matters, since after I cut the avocados, I squeeze their 'meat' out of their skins and then send them through the blades of my Magic Bullet. Bruising them as they are opened is the LEAST of the avocado's concern.  (But I will do Auntie Lois's method, because she's awesome and why would I stray from her advice?)

I decided to prepare my "Award Winning Guac*" for the Super Bowl party my mom and dad were hosting...

* Tim gave me the guac award, it might not count, but if Tim's happy - we're all happy.

My auntie Terri was very curious as to how the Magic Bullet works, since she's heard so much about them.  I zip the first half of the batch off into the M.B.'s Blender attachment.  Not very impressive since I didn't use enough Lime Juice (not having a recipe can sometimes hurt).  It took a few stirs, a few shakes & a couple more caps of lime juice before it was working.

Of course I managed to chew up the end of my mom's wooden spoon. 
...TURN OFF BLENDER
... WAIT FOR BLADES TO STOP
... THEN STICK IN SPOON...  Elementary (jr. high?) Home Econ, right?


I don't *think* any wood ended up in my guac.

Then, as I attempt to cut my avocado the "proper" way according to Auntie Lois, I manage to slice through the avocado & into my pinky.  Okay - in her defense at no time did Lois say "hold the avocado in your hand & cut TOWARDS your flesh".  But that's the Sara Way.  
I decided against the ambulance ride and the 72 stitches to reattach my finger.  2 Band-Aids and a scoop of Guacamole did the trick. 
(The scoop of Guacamole was for my mental health - not the wound.  I'm unaware of any healing powers in guacamole.  However, I have learned that the ONION can reattach fingers & heal large wounds... that's another story).
Cousin Carrie offered to work the knife for me since I was a little apprehensive.  


Spoon-ruined CHECK
Finger-injured   CHECK
Two Large Bowls of DELICIOUS homemade Guacamole   CHECK!

Another successful cooking story from Sara Lou.